I Hate Your iPod®: Take Three

I totally called this one, too. Not that I said anything here. But I called it, mentally, every time someone was like "ooo, ooo, I want an iPhone!". Truly, how is it that touch screens are supposed to be the wave of the future? I think it sounds like a terrible idea. The first thing to break on everyone's stuff -- mp3 players, regular cell phones, Blackberries, etc. -- is usually the display. So why bother to make that the central point of functionality on your gadget? Especially when something as ubiquitous and basic as water (necessary for human existence, might I remind you) can disable your screen in less than ten seconds? What happens when you get thrown in the pool? C'mon. Everyone secretly likes getting thrown or pushed into the pool. Why not avoid the stress of possibly having a ridiculously expensive electronic device in your pocket when you're being dunked?