Breaking Up With Kisses

...is going to be really, really hard.

Lately I've developed an fondness for -- nay, an addiction to -- Hershey's Kisses.

My chocolate-loving but expensive-palated Captain Boyfriend will no doubt turn up his nose at this admission (and probably give me a hearty glare, since I'm eternally bemoaning my propensity for snacking to the point where it bores him). Not for him, the cheap offshoots of the noble cocoa-processing tradition. He's a Black & Green's man.


Regardless, there it is. I can't seem to escape the chocolate. Every time I stray, every time the scale scares me straight to the narrow, it's only a matter of time before I'm tiptoeing back to that sweet familiar sin, welcomed with open arms and soothing sugar. Until now.

Today I had a dentist's exam. I'm not sure if A) it's because I haven't had my teeth cleaned in X number of Xs, or if it's B) because my old dentist and his various assistants really didn't know how to clean teeth well or if it's C) the technician who cleaned my teeth today was trained onsite at Gitmo but SWEET SUFFERING NELLIE. That was the most painful teeth cleaning I've had in ages. She was a nice lady but people, let me warn you against the dentist in Brighton Center. I mean, my teeth look good, don't get me wrong, they just hurt like hell for about half an hour solid.

But more importantly, I had my X-rays done for the first time in ages and the results were thoroughly unsettling. I have X number of cavities! Cavities! Again!! I've had a fair amount of cavities throughout my life already which I chalk up to both heredity and a raging sweet-tooth (This just in: Sugar really and truly does cause cavities. I'm living proof). But I thought/hoped I'd grown out of it. It's particularly painful now that I have to pay for my own medical procedures, and even onefilling is expensive enough.

The gist of all this is: I have to break up with my Hershey's Kisses. Really, with my sweet-tooth in general. As a creature of habits and a creature of comforts, this is really unfortunate. Please, no one say "Oh! try carrot sticks and celery! It really helps curb the cravings! Cause you munch on insipid vegetables instead of the candy that you're really longing for, and will continue to long for no matter how many insipid veggies you munch!!" People say the same damn thing when you're trying to quit smoking, and also probably when you're in life-threatening automobile accidents (This also just in: Insipid Vegetables found to be a Good Substitute for Morphine!).

No, the only way I've ever done this -- and I have done it before -- is to quit cold turkey. I find that craving sugar gets less intense the longer you go without it, but I find it very difficult to go without it permanently. And once I go back, it's like a saturnalia. I binge for days. I look at the suggested serving size, note that on my calorie counter chart, and then eat three times the amount suggested. I have to say I am pretty good about keeping track of how many sweets I've eaten even when I go over the self-imposed limit, but I often justify my intake with the perceived amount of calories I'll spend during my daily workout, or my bike-ride to campus and around, or any walks I might take during the day... (the reality? not nearly enough).

I'm still looking for the perfect balance. Until I find it, I've had my last kiss.